Years later, I wrote for General Hospital, a show in which many of the characters had corrupt values. They were malicious, engaged in endless conflicts and betrayals, jealousies and affairs, secrets and lies. I found success in my work by probing into the shadowy inner world of these characters. With my imagination and intuition, I dug into the darkness of their motivations and their cruel, pathological behaviors.
I was driven by a fierce, critical internal voice that prodded me to push myself to exhaustion for ratings and the rewards of professional recognition. I wrote and rewrote storylines depicting evil manipulations and emotional and psychological abuse. I participated in creating hundreds of episodes of twisted human relationships, watched daily by millions of viewers who, like my grandmother, grew addicted to the tales I was telling.
Inside of me, however, I had a growing uneasiness, an awareness that I was not doing work that would leave the world a better place. Slowly, painfully, I acknowledged that I was dedicating years of my life to spreading poison. This will be my legacy, I realized.
I found myself in a classic and horrific “mid-life crisis.”
I began therapy with a wise and caring Jungian analyst. We explored my history, the facets of myself that were repressed, buried in my unconscious. With time, I was able to see beyond the defensive fog of my own making and reflect on my true self. I was able to overcome my fears and insecurities, to silence my harsh, inner critical voice. In its place, I developed a voice of self-compassion. My authenticity was liberated and my life changed.
I have now worked as a psychotherapist and Jungian analyst for 25 years. It has been my privilege to provide a supportive environment for clients to bring their personal challenges and concerns.
Talking openly about one’s difficulties can start to ease them more quickly than might be imagined.
I invite you to call me for a free consultation.